Addressing family relationships

Family can offer a HOTBED of learning opportunities. It's important to remember that family members are individuals traveling along their own unique path. At first, issues can arise that trigger rage, resentment, and deep memories of similar "ugly situations." When we can look inside ourselves, and release our own anger, rage, judging, blaming, and not forgiving. Then, we can begin to explore ways to release unhealthy patterns of interaction with family members. It is up to us to decide whether or not we choose to continue an unhealthy "dance." Sometimes it helps to send lovingkindness to the family member who is engaged in a pattern of interaction that has worked for them for many years. When we come from a place of gentle patience, then we can unravel and stop unhealthy patterns of interaction. It's the first step along a healthier new path in family relationships.

Honey or Vinegar?

“You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar,” American proverb.

Is it true that nice guys finish last? A friend and I were talking about the positive approach to dealing with daily life issues (i.e., curtain orders installed incorrectly, cell phone providers serving us improperly, banks changing fee structures and extra charges). Sometimes, it feels like being nice takes longer—not only from our perspective, but also in the delayed actions of others. Our world is so full of individuals losing their temper, making demands, and threatening negative consequences, that it really does seem like “the squeaky wheel gets the grease.”

Those of us who recognize that putting out that kind of negativity is only sowing the seeds of more negativity in the future are now facing a dilemma—how do we react and still get things accomplished? Experimentation and sharing ideas as we learn seems to be the only approach. If we reflect back on how we act when we are facing angry individuals making demands on us, we realize that these hot-tempered people may get quick results, but they aren’t always the best results. In fact, sometimes we withhold information and give them shortcut fixes. They are served the solution that will get them out the door in the fastest way possible. In contrast, consider how we feel when we are working with an individual who is patient and pleasant. We may take a bit longer to serve them, yet we also give them a little more. We might suggest a better solution, offer additional help, or provide greater services at no extra charge. That smile on our face is genuine, not rehearsed.

The holiday season is ripe with opportunities to better understand the best, and the worst, that human beings have to offer. It brings out the spirit of giving and inspires us to connect with family and friends. It also creates a sense of hurriedness, as we rush to decorate, purchase gifts, and participate in events. We have the free will to decide which ripple effect we choose to create. We can simplify and give ourselves the space to enjoy the true spirit of the season. When we are charitable to ourselves, we have more to give others. When we are rested, we can be patient. When we shorten our to-do list, we can savor treasured moments. It’s up to us—do we choose to experience honey or vinegar?

Hugs--tc

Dispelling Negativity

“Negativity has within it the seeds of its own destruction,” Emmanuel’s Book, p. 86.

Have you ever noticed that people who put out a lot of negativity seem to have a lot of difficulty in their life? If we truly believe “We reap what we sow,” then it isn’t surprising that negative thoughts create additional hardship. Certainly, we don’t wish for others to live in difficult circumstances, yet the situation can be understood as an accumulation of many factors that amplify the negative side of life. It is cruel to say that individuals facing dark times want to live under dire circumstances. Each of us is seeking joy, freedom, and love. Hardship is another lesson in the schoolroom of life, it is not intended to imprison or suppress us.

How do we address negativity—by focusing on the negative or positive? Let’s look at abundance, for example. These harsh economic times have many of us feeling tight financially. When our thoughts are focused on what we lack (i.e., I don’t have money, I can’t buy this present, there’s never enough time to get everything done), then we attract more of what is missing into our life. When we focus on the present moment, and see what we have (i.e., all of my bills are paid right now, I accomplished this today, a simple joy came into my life today), then we attract more of these positive experiences. Our life truly becomes more fulfilling, and we feel better.

When we see negativity around us, we can protect ourselves with a shield of light to repel darkness away from us. We can imagine a spotlight from above shining on the individual(s) carrying the negativity. It’s important to be very careful –we do not feed the negativity. We can choose to be the source of additional negativity or the source of healing and light. We have the free will to decide how to act, react, and address negativity when it comes into our life. Our thoughts, actions, and beliefs create a ripple effect into the universe and come back to us in unexpected ways. Our inner power gains strength when we do not allow negativity to influence the seeds we sow each day, so that we contribute to the positive energy in the universe.

Hugs--tc

Seeing Violence in New Ways

Is it possible to see violence with greater clarity? Can we transform violence into light?

Remember, each of us is here to learn during our lifelong journey. Like children in a schoolroom, we are learning, we are learning, we are learning. Violence is created by unbalanced energy, discordant feelings, and limiting beliefs. Rather than serving as a punishment, it is an opportunity to make a free will choice…which will we choose to bring into our life-- negative or positive energy?

When we see things that are despicable, we are tempted to make accusations and judge others. At times, violence causes our gut to wrench and rattles our faith. What if we could see violence as a distortion of light? Before the light was filtered by limiting beliefs and false illusions that spiraled into violence, what did it look like in its original state? When we hold a deep faith and trust in the loving energy that connects each of use, we can see that violence is a form of speaking up, and affirming, strongly held beliefs. Beliefs that lead to violence may be distorted, yet there is courage in this effort to witness. Those involved in violence have distorted the universal light into a loud temper tantrum, like small children shouting, “I exist… this is important…look--and see ME!”. The volume of this negative energy can get amplified to the point that it seems as if the whole world is filled with negativity.

When we remain aware that violence is simply a distortion of the light, we can release any negativity within ourselves that may have consciously, or subconsciously, connected to violence in the universe. We focus on the protective light swirling around us to repel negative energies away from us. As we release any seeds of darkness within ourselves, we increase the light in our own heart. As we imagine light from above shining into dark areas, we create a ripple that expands out to bring light into negative energy. As we contribute to the shrinking of darkness, the light in the universe grows brighter. When we see violence as the light force it can be transformed into, we tap our inner power.

Hugs--tc

Seeing Darkness in New Ways

How do we put the darkness that exists in our world into perspective?

If we see the universe as filled with loving energy that unites all our hearts, then darkness is only a shadow. Each of us is here to learn during our lifelong journey. The darkness in and around us is created by blocked energy, forgetfulness, and our own limiting beliefs. It exists as an opportunity to learn, not as an effort to obstruct or suppress. Without the dualism of negative and positive energies, how can we learn to shed light on the negative while we remain focused on the positive?

It takes an initial leap of faith to trust that love and light surround our world. When we see evil, negativity, and darkness, we can remind ourselves that these are only shadows caused by forgetfulness of our spiritual connection to each other. We can imagine ourselves surrounded by a protective light that repels these negative energies away from us. We can imagine light from above shining into the dark areas, illuminating and shrinking the darkness. We can look within to tap the energy in our heart that is aware, but not lost in… or swept away by … ugly experiences. We can focus on expanding that light within to release any negative energy we have consciously, or subconsciously, absorbed. Amazingly, we will suddenly feel lighter. Try it! Test it out! It works!

Hugs--tc

The Virtuous Qualities of Happiness

The movie "Happy" illuminated how "happiness" really comes from within, regardless of money, appearance, and social expectations. Living life by the virtuous qualities of happiness--is this the key? If so, then “Creating Love and Joy: Uplifting affirmations to strengthen your spirit,” identifies 33 virtuous qualities and helps us to implement them in our life. :-) Hugs--tc

Magical Coincidences

Each day, events take place that shape and influence my life. When I intentionally create my day, little things happen that are the result of my creation. I call these “magical coincidences.” I choose to recognize these positive influences, as evidenced by these magical coincidences, and feel the joy that comes with my newly found insight. I permanently release and replace any discordant thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and actions that might arise with the pure loving energy that envelopes the universe. In this way, my efforts are much more than just a positive thinking veneer covering a mountain of negativity—I am creating new, healthy synapses in the brain. Each day I grow stronger, and more powerful, until my confidence in my ability to create all that I have and experience far exceeds any lingering doubts. Hugs--tc

Creating our Day

I am light protecting me from all harm. I choose to take this moment to create my day. I trust that all my thoughts, feelings, actions, and beliefs affect the quantum field, thereby creating all that I experience. I know the universe is full of limitless possibilities and magical coincidences. I choose to bring these into my life in a peaceful, fulfilling way so that I can joyfully recognize the positive influences that I am creating, and permanently release all doubt, fear, resentment, rage and judgment. I permanently replace my discordant thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and actions with the pure loving energy that envelopes the universe. Hugs--tc